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January/February 2011 Issue

Jim and Tim's Won't Do List for 2011

We know that you're supposed to make resolutions this time of year, so we'll resolve to not do the following in 2011:

Tim will not clean out his gutters. He figure all of those little maple seedlings growing in the rotting leaves will some day provide additional shade for his house - and then he can make a few bucks selling the little trees when they start getting too heavy for the roof.

We will not spend time explaining to our wives why duct tape is better than transparent tape when packaging gifts.

We will not write a book about electrical tape, cable ties, or panty hose.

We will not lose a collective 50 pounds by June 1st by doing the Insanity Workout.

Jim will not cover his neighbor's house entirely in green and yellow Packer color duct tape ever again (with asking him first).

Tim will no longer be waxing Jim's back with duct tape during any public performance of their stage show (sorry to those who had to witness this hideous event last year).

We won't be trying any Mythbuster-type stunts like duct taping ourselves to the bottom of an airplane to see if the tape holds at speeds over 150 miles per hour at 30,000 feet.

Finally, we hereby resolve to not drive our van backwards down the freeway (Jim's recent repair job makes it kind of hard to see out of our back window).

Happy 2011 from the Duct Tape Guys!

Stay warm while making cool stuff this winter.

Time to stock up on your tape for the year and start your duct tape crafting projects. There are a ton of craft projects you can do using the colored and patterned duct tape. You can get some ideas by checking our fashions and fashion accessories pages. How about starting a duct tape club that meets monthly to design and make new duct tape crafts? Every person has to bring a new craft project each meeting and teach the others how to make it... It's a fun way to get to know people, to exercise your creativity, and maybe even pick up a few extra bucks at the same time by selling your items online or at work/school.

Don't know where to get Duck brand's colored and patterned tape? Just check their handy Where to Buy link on the Duck Tape Club site.

Speaking of making cool stuff...

Check out this Rube Goldberg-type contraption video. (click here) When the alarm clock goes off, the drapes open. Easy, right? Well, these two Cambridge University engineering grads could NOT make it simple. This is one of the biggest contraptions we've seen. And, the amount of duct tape used is pretty danged impressive as well. All shot in one take? Maybe yes, maybe not - in any case it's head-scratchingly amusing to watch. Thanks to Pete for the find.

Want to see another one? Here's one that's not quite as impressive, but amazing none-the-less - "Cream that [Cadburry] Egg!" click here

This issue of Duct Tape on a Roll is brought to you by:

and by (click on > to play):

Meet us at The Duct Tape Diner. We’ve had some great stories over the counter at the Duct Tape Diner recently. If you haven’t yet read the Diner contributions, stop by! This is where we invite our visitors to share their own duct tape stories.

Just like these people did:

Did your duct tape use appear on our website?
We have a shirt for you! Click to our Pro Shop and go to the apparel section to order! This specially priced shirt proclaims that your duct tape use was used on - the perfect gift if someone you know was featured on our site. Just click the shirt to order online!

Dog Collar Zapper Protector I have 2 really big dogs and an invisible fence to keep them in the yard. One dog destroyed the other dog's electrical zapper collar. Great to chomp down on when rough housing in the back yard. ($150 expense for replacement collar!) I now put about 6 layers of duct tape to secure the battery and protect the electronics. I get about 2 months of "dog abuse" with this great idea. - Tim M-V

Dog Boot My dog injured a paw and required a bandage to be kept on it for 6 weeks. Of course it needed to be kept dry too, so after trying a few different things and deciding that dog boots are just to expensive (and not shaped like a dog's bandaged paw) I hit on the idea of using Duct tape. Putting a small kid's sock over the bandage and wrapping the lot in Duct tape made a custom sized-waterproof-removable boot. I am however ashamed to admit that I did let the vet use so called 'medical tape' to keep the bandage on... John B.

Gooey Farmers My father was a duct tape specialist from way back. His most useful project was recovering the seat on a D17 Allis-Chalmers tractor. It didn't have a cab, so after time passed with the tractor being in the sun the duct tape goo eventually oozed out of the edges and you'd come off the field with the back of your legs sticky with duct tape adhesive. - Melinda Good point to remember - if you are going to have duct tape in the head, it will ooze after a while. So cover your duct tape repair job with a sheet of plastic before using it.

Ski Boot Repair My cross-country ski boot was getting old and the top latch busted. No worries. Duck brand's white duct tape to the rescue! It even blends in with the snow. Does that make it winter camo tape? - Jana, St. Paul, MN

Computer Bag Strap Cushion and Dog Leash repair. My computer bag strap was cutting into my shoulder. Other than that, it was a good bag. So I got an old towel and wrapped it around the strap and wrapped that with duct tape. Now, it not only looks totally sick (good), but is comfortable as well.

Oh, and my dog's leash foam handle busted. Duct tape to the rescue again. You might say both my dog and I now have matching fashion accessories. - Adam M., St. Paul, MN

The Duct Tape Store has moved...
We moved our Duct Tape Pro Shop to Octane Street. In an effort to update our stores and get them to a place where more people can find them, we moved them to Octane Street. Here you can still purchase our books (in the bookstore) and Duct Tape apparel (in the Humor Apparel Store). There's also a storefront for the Duct Tape Guys. Check it out and click around Octane Street - you just might discover some other humorous creations from Tim and company while you are there.

We're on Facebook

We're just as much into the "social networking" thing as the next guy - and would rather you get on our email list where you get notices of special sales, duct tape product news, our newsletter, etc. But, if you are totally into facebook, we'll meet you there, too. Just click on the link on the left and we'll "friend" the heck outta ya!

Duct Tape: The Musical For those of you in NE Wisconsin, we are doing a reprise of our Musical at Third Avenue Playhouse in Sturgeon Bay, Wisconsin on January 22 and 23rd. More information at Do you have a performing arts theatre near you that might be interested in hosting our 90-minute G-Rated Comedy Musical? Send them this link and we'll see if we can get the show to your neck of the woods: - Thanks!

Check out our Calendar! We may be heading to a town near you, soon. We have upcoming shows in Indianapolis and Fort Wayne, Indiana, Columbia, SC and Atlantic City. Check our calendar here.

Dale's Discoveries
(A feature that showcases weird stuff that our friend Dale comes up with.) Visit Dale's TallToysTroupe site.

I like all you can eat buffets better now that I sewed those Ziploc bags into my pockets.

My daughter had a sleepover party with some girls for her thirteenth birthday. I guess I am way more permissive than my parents were. When I was thirteen, I couldn't have girls sleeping over.

This just in - an infinite number of monkeys at an infinite number of typewriters has come up with the latest episode of Jersey Shore.

I heard that scientists have found a way to reverse the aging process in rats. I don't know about you, but I was pretty happy with rats not living all that long.

I went to Red Lobster for their "Endless Shrimp" but they threw me out when they closed for the night. Sounds like false advertising to me.

If I went back in time and didn't catch that butterfly in the net, would the East Coast be having those blizzards now?

If I ever got really sick, I would get a Select Comfort bed. I think it would be really cool to have a "Sleep Number Death Bed."

While I was marveling at the absolute beauty of the sunrise I couldn't help but be filled with wonder. I was wondering why in the world I was up so darned early.

The trouble with having to be up early in the morning is that you are much more likely to run into morning people.

Speaking of that, why do people either say, "I am a morning person" or, "I am a night person". Aren't there any afternoon or evening people?

The movie, "Where the Wild Things Are" may be the only movie I could ever see wherein I had read the book 100 times before seeing it.

I hope this trend of making movies out of children's books continues. I can't wait to see what the Cohen brothers do with "Everybody Poops".

I think I can handle Mondays better when I call them Tuesday Eves.

Just how rich do you have to be to "biddy biddy bum" all day?

I might be what you would call a political inactivist. I nap for peace.

Pope, Supreme Court Justice, the Dude. Just a few professions where you get to wear a robe to work.

I think that the best part of not having TV is no Andy Rooney.

Power naps. Absolute power naps absolutely.

Dale's Website Discoveries

Ok, I know this isn't a website, it is a video. It's still cool though. Deal with it. clickee link thing

Well, since I got away with that one, here is one more. Yes, it's true, I love cool folding furniture. This is the best I have seen. the next clickee link thing

Jim and Tim's Web Site Finds:
Doodle online with a powerful drawing program... you'll be impress what you can come up with. Click here.

Second find: Are you artsy and craftsy and into recycling? Check out these cool architectural projects made using recycled materials. Click here.

Third find: You, too, can be a funky new-age space musician... just click the squares in any random order: Click here.

Church Bulletin Bloopers

Thank God for church ladies with poor typing and/or proofreading skills - they result in some pretty hilarious (and often embarrassing announcements. These sentences actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:

The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on Water." The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."

Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.

Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale.. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.

The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to
a conflict.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.

Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.

Meanwhile, in the Catholic School Lunchroom... The children were lined up for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.

Looking for gags for home, work or school?

You can find all kinds of great pranks in Tim's Practical Joker's handbooks - both volumes are available here: There is even a practical joker's kit that comes with the books - and, of course, if you buy them directly from Tim, he'll autograph them for you! click the books on the right to buy

Nab all the cool, original Duct Tape Pro™ Duct Tape Apparel you want at the Pro Shop
The Duct Tape Pro Shop is the only place in the universe to get Genuine Duct Tape Guys Originals. There are many rip-offs available - some at major department stores, but they're illegal copyright infringements. Please don't buy them. Anything that you see on our site are our original designs and slogans.

And remember, when it comes time to buy our BOOKS - including the WD-40 Book and the entire Duct Tape genre for your dad, grandpa... friends and relatives (or yourself) there's no better place than the Pro Shop - that's because we autograph everything that we ship. And, we've got GREAT deals that you won't find anywhere else - in the world! So stop by the Duct Tape Pro Shop and see what's in store for you! Thanks for your patronage! - The Duct Tape Guys

Well, that’s it for now
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May the Tape be with you!
- Jim and Tim - The Duct Tape Guys

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