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October into November 2008 issue

It's Fall!
It's our favorite time of year - the leaves are changing, there is a crispness in the air (which is great because we get to wear sweatshirts, sweaters and jackets - that bulk us out so we have an excuse for our massive girth), halloween is right around the corner (also great - because it's the only time that Jim and I don't have people staring at us thinkin' we're dressed funny), and November is Tim's birthday (and I have all my gift hints well placed this year).

Speaking of Halloween, let's take a little cruise through some of our halloween favorites (of course, they are made with duct tape (we recommend Duck brand's colored duct tape for the utmost creative experience). If you don't have any idea of what you want to make for your costume, we have our "Original Duct Tape Halloween Book" which features over 100 clever ideas. You can order it from our Duct Tape Pro Shop.

And now - that glimpse of favorite costumes that we promised you - starting with Jim's favorite (although now wearing the wrong colors), Brett Favre:

You can click here for more ideas and a looksee at our Halloween Costume Video! Click the book to order or look for it in your favorite book store.

Tim's shamless gallery promotion
Tim just updated his gallery web site - it's "freakin' awesome!" according to one visitor. So, whether you are into art or not (Tim's is pretty fun stuff...), check out

Stick or Treat Contest
Stick or Treat - halloween contest from Duck© brand. Click the logo for more info - hurry - deadline is coming soon!

Another Reminder: Duct Tape Saves the Day!
A wise man once said, "The one thing people love more than duct tape, is telling their duct tape story," and we agree. That's why the Duck Tape Club® announced the Duck® Brand Duct Tape "SAVES THE DAY" Promotion. They invited all those people with original and ingenius duct tape "SAVES THE DAY" stories competing for a grand prize of $5,000! Check out the winners at

Extreme Ductover
HAYWARD — Duct tape knew no limits at the “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” contest Saturday. Many footballs and jerseys were in the running to help decorate Derik DeVries new bedroom. One contestant constructed a duck with an electric pencil sharpener near its rear end and another made a monstrous popcorn box costume.

From 4-year-olds to distinguished artists, the surrounding communities came together to create about 70 pieces, hoping theirs would win the ultimate prize, a trophy made of duct tape. Derik’s love for duct tape brought together this diverse crowd, gathered in a harvested corn field. Read more of the article in the Albert Lea (Minnesota) Tribune: here

Remember, to go exploring!
We always include this handy little pull-down menu in our newsletter and on our main page. This is an easy way for you to explore the world's most massive online tribute to duct tape:

It's not too late to vote for us!
The Duct Tape Party Platform - get familiar with how duct tape can save the country - and tell your candidate to embrace these ideas. Or, just vote for The Duct Tape Guys for President! Check out the entire mess of ideas here.
whatever you do, if you are of age, remember to VOTE on November 2nd! If you aren't old enough - remind someone who is!

Did you catch the Duct Tape Guys on YouTube yet?
In case you didn't visit our YouTube site, you're missing a lot of great Duct Tape Guy videos from our past television appearances, out-takes, goofball antics, AND - our Bid for the President video (at least our announcement). We're working on getting a video of our entire half-hour stand-up show (Which should be posted in June by Father's Day.) And, if you have any video of the duct tape guys in action, please pass it by us first before you post it on YouTube - we want to keep the Duct Tape Guy (crud) quality to everything out there that represents us. Okay? Thanks.

Speak of elections - this issue is brought to you by - creator of this unique Campaign 2008 shirt - if you love Sarah Palin, or hate her (how could you hate her, she's so... cute) - this is a shirt that will work for you and be a great souvenir of the 2008 election experience:

Dale's Discoveries
(A monthly feature that will be showcasing weird stuff that our friend Dale comes up with.) Visit Dale's TallToysTroupe site

What is the deal now with finding things in stores? It used to be that people who worked in stores would ask you if you had any questions about things or if they could help you with something, now they want to know if they can help you find something. Or, when you get to the cashier, they ask you if you found everything okay. Are stores hiding things now? If you told them that you couldn't find something would they tell you if you were warmer or colder? I just assumed that, if I couldn't find it, they didn't have it. Maybe the popularity of "Blue's Clues" has had an influence here.

Why don't they make a dark light beer?

My sister tells me that she saw some hot dog buns that advertised they were "Fancy enough to serve at your finest dinners." I suppose that, for regular dinners, you would just have the hot dogs loose on the plate.

Finally, here is another helpful hint for living for you soon-to-be newlyweds. When you go to a store to register for wedding gifts, you don't just automatically get them. You have to tell people to go buy them for you. I wish I had known that.

Dale's website discovery of the month:

How many times have you overheard part of a conversation and thought it was worthy of print? I remember one time when I was in a grocery store and saw two extremely overweight women each pushing two full carts. They were standing near the frozen foods section and one of them said, "These Weight Watcher meals are really good but they are so small that you have to eat three or four of them." True story, that actually happened but I had no place to publish it. Well, I suppose I just now did but you know what I mean. Anyway, here is a website for comments that are overheard daily in New York. This is something that you may find yourself checking each day. Remember though that this is New York so some of the comments may not be suitable for young readers:

GRAY MUTTER And, make sure you check out this cool site - filled with humorous sayings plastered on apparel - all created by the quick wit of Dale and designed by Tim (buddies since college). Click to

Jim and Tim's Cool Website Finds
Derrick Brown is Tim's kind of poet... listen to the entire intro page - brilliantly tongue-in-cheek funny. He's a serious, respected poet - who doesn't take himself so seriously -

Public Space Animation (if you've ever done animation - or know an animator, you'll appreciate the incredible amount of work that this took)

And last but not least (or, possibly last, as the case may be....) How much caffeine will it take to kill you? - check for your caffeinated favorite vice.

Meet us at The Duct Tape Diner. We’ve had some great stories over the counter at the Duct Tape Diner recently. If you haven’t yet read the Diner contributions, stop by! This is where we invite our visitors to share their own duct tape stories. Just like these people did:

Duct tape on the High Seas
The West Canada Creek (NY) make-your-own boat and float competition was graced by the Pirates of the West Canada (Earl Wilson, Jim Okey and Goe Bessmer) again this year. And what a mass of duct tape they used! Over three miles of duct tape! Yeah, they probably pirated the tape.

Dog Training I compete in dog agility, my dog is Rhodesian Ridgeback mix and her name is Junebug.  She's very, very good at agility.  I made some practice jumps and weaves out of PVC pipe and duct tape.  To make them easier to carry around I used an old tarp, duct taped it into the shape of a bag, poked a couple of holes near the top and used a spiral type rolling method to make a string out of duct tape to put through the holes to tie around the top so the poles don't fall out.  I also made a handle out of duct tape folded over on itself and wrapped with more tape and taped it to the bag.  I can now carry it like you'd carry a suitcase or sling it over my shoulder.  It's waterproof and very convenient as well as light weight (I'm a five foot tall female with fibromyalgia and don't have a lot of strength). - Jean and Junebug

Glorious Insults

In this season of political mud-slinging, we thought it would be appropriate to post these gloriously clever insults from history (before insults were boiled down to four-letter words. The list was collected by Peter Monheit (thanks, Pete):

The famous exchange between Churchill and Lady Astor - she said, "If you were my husband, I'd give you poison" He said, "If you were my wife, I'd take it."

"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr

"He has all the virtues I dislike and one of the vices I admire." - Winston Churchill

"A modest little person, with much to be modest about." - Winston Churchill

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." - Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary." - William Faulkner about Ernest Hemingway

"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?" - Ernest Hemingway about William Faulkner

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll wast no time reading it." - Moses Hadas

"He can compress the most words into the smalest idea of any man I know." - Abraham Lincoln

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends." - Oscar Wile

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second, if there is one." - Winston Churchill in response

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others." - Samuel Jackson

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating

"There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure." - Jack E. Leonard

"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt." - Robert Redford

"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge." - Thomas Brackett Reed

"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." Charles, Count of Talleyride

"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." - Oscar Wilde

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts; for support rather than illumination." - Andrew Lang

"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder

Tim's art on shirts. Check out Tim's goofy paintings on apparel. click here

and while we're talkin' about apparel, you can nab all the cool, original Duct Tape Pro™ Duct Tape Apparel you want at the Pro Shop
The Duct Tape Pro Shop is the only place in the universe to get Genuine Duct Tape Guys Originals. There are many rip-offs available - some at major department stores, but they're illegal copyright infringements. Please don't buy them. Anything that you see on our site are our original designs and slogans.

And remember, when it comes time to buy our BOOKS - including the WD-40 Book and the entire Duct Tape genre for your dad, grandpa... friends and relatives (or yourself) there's no better place than the Pro Shop - that's because we autograph everything that we ship. And, we've got GREAT deals that you won't find anywhere else - in the world! So stop by the Duct Tape Pro Shop and see what's in store for you! Thanks for your patronage! - The Duct Tape Guys

Well, that’s it for now. Remember that you can share this FREE duct tape and humor newsletter with your friends. Just send them this address: so they can SUBSCRIBE to our email notification list.

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May the Tape be with you!
- Jim and Tim - The Duct Tape Guys

Click here for archived On a Roll Newsletters: 1/02, 2/02, 3/02, 03/19/02, 4/02, 5/02, 6/02, 7/02, 08/02, 09/02. 10/02, 11/02, 12/02, 01/03, 02/03, 03/03, 4/03, 05/03. 06/03 07/03 8/03 9/03 10/03 11/03, 12/03, 1/04, 2/04, 3/04, 4/04, 5/04, 6/04, 7/04, 8/04, 9/04, 10/04, election issue, 11/04, 12/04, 01/05, 2/05, 3/05, 4/05, 5/05, 06/05, 7/05, 08/05, 09/05, 10/05, 11/05, 12/05, 01/06, 2/06, 3/06, 4/06, 5/06, 6/06, 7/06, 8/06, 9/06,10/06,11/06, 12/06, 1/07, 2/07, 3/07. 4/07, 5/07, 6/07. 7/07, 8-9/07, 10-11/07, 12/07, 01/08, 02-03/08,4-5/08, 6-7/08, 8-9/08, 10-11/08,