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Submissions Please
If you have a joke or story that you would like to submit for inclusion in our next newsletter, email it to us. Just make sure it's suitable for all ages (we don't publish anything off-color). Thanks again!

Go Directly to:
Our web site is getting massive. So we will always include this handy little pull-down menu in our newsletter and on our main page. Go discover the world's most massive online tribute to duct tape:

Quotes of the Month:
"Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together...." - Carl Zwanzig (We have no idea who Carl is, nor why he's credited with this phrase - which we've heard from literally thousands of people in our fourteen years of duct tape evangelism... but, here's to you, Carl Zwanzig for getting credited for the quote.)

Soapbox presents Tim's personal opinions about issues that he feels are of importance.
It has challenging stuff to think about during your duct taping projects. If you want a dose of stuff to think about click here. If you don't want to, that's okay. Tape on! Here is a brief intro to what's in this month's SOAPBOX:

The Iraq war and the threat of climate change are the twin global threats that millions of Americans said they wanted immediate action on after the U.S. mid-term election... click here

Are you on our e-mail list?
Click here - to subscribe. Then MAKE SURE you respond to the verification email that comes your way after you subscribe to make sure your email is activated in the system. Remember, we never sell or share our list with anyone and you can easily unsubscribe at any time. - Jim and Tim

Wear your favorite tool
Gain the respect of guys everywhere by shouting out your allegiance to the most popular (low tech) power tool in the world: Duct Tape. Our Duct Tape Apparel has the shirt, cap, shorts, etc. for you. Visit The Duct Tape Pro Shop today and get some serious shopping done! The Pro Shop is the only place in the universe to get Genuine Duct Tape Guys Originals. There are many rip-offs available - some at major department stores, but they're illegal copyright infringements. Please don't buy them. Anything that you see on our site are our original designs and sloggans. Thanks for your patronage! - The Duct Tape Guys

Tim's ART Online

In case you didn't know it, besides being a Duct Tape Evangelist,Tim is also an artist. His paintings can been seen online at his Gallery web site. Or, if you are touring around Door County, Wisconsin, Tim invites you to stop by Gallery Forty Two to see his art in person. Take a minute right now to check his latest creations at

October/November 2007

It's Halloween Time Again...
We've said it before, and we'll say it again, "Halloween is our favorite holiday/event of the year!" Primarily because it's the only time of year that people don't look at us and think we're dressed funny. It's also a really cool time to grab some rolls of colored duct tape, put on your wacky thinking cap and see what you can create to make you stand out as the most creatively costumed person at the Halloween party.

We're here to help with our "Original Duct Tape Halloween Book." You can get a sneak peek at this massive full-color tome by clicking here. You can also see the incredible costumes that people have created with duct tape in our Halloween costume gallery. Go ahead, take a look right now. We'll wait for you right here...

Inspired? We knew you'd like it. Now's your big opportunity to pick up a copy of "The Original Duct Tape Halloween Book" autographed and at a special price. Just visit The Duct Tape Pro Shop and click the Deals button. You'll find this $8.95 book for only $5* - order a bunch for the kids and grandkids and save money on shipping (*flat rate shipping charge applies). We'll also throw in a free bumper sticker and Duct Tape Pro button with your order.

Looking for colored duct tape? Duck® brand has about 20 colors now including Camo and Clear. You can find a nice assortment at Michael's stores nationwide, and ACE Hardware has a few colors. Click here to check the current Duck® colors.

Not just another Duct Tape Wallet... We get a lot of duct tape wallet submissions (see our duct tape fashion and fashion accessory area). But this guy, we thought was doing something unique and doing a really nice job of it. So, here's a rip of the roll to Shaun Withers and a link to his "QualityDuctTapeWallets" site.

The unique concept behind Shaun's wallets is that YOU design them, and he creates them for you. Take a look at this wallet that he created for a Coca Cola fanatic - 100% duct tape - carefully cut and applied graphics make these, like he says, quality wallets.

Feel like doing it yourself? Okay - take a look at our Make-It-Yourself section for wallet-making directions. If you get frustrated, just click to Shaun's website and let him take over for you.

This newsletter is sponsored in part by Duck brand Duct Tape - Home of The Original Duck Tape Club.

Dale's Discoveries
(A monthly feature that will be showcasing weird stuff that our friend Dale comes up with.) Visit Dale's TallToysTroupe site

Well, this month we moved to Colorado from the East Coast and are doing our best to adjust. The first day here we were issued a Subaru and a lexan water bottle. Now, if we just get some bicycles, we will be allowed to buy a house.

One thing I noticed is that there seem to be less aggressive and reckless drivers out here than in the New York Metropolitain area. At first I thought that was because of the generally more laid back atmosphere. Or maybe it was because of the Colorado State Patrol's policy of reporting them by cell phone. I have come to realize that it is probably due to the high percentage of winding mountain roads with no guard rails.

I heard an ad on the radio for a gourmet buffet brunch. They were telling about the expertise of their executive chef and describing all the superb entrees. Then they mentioned the price and it was indeed expensive. One thing they said, though, was that children under 5 were free. Immediately I thought of what a great place that would be to have my son's fourth birthday party.

Website Discovery of the Month
Ok, I know this is an ad for this blender, but these are some of the funniest videos I have seen in awhile. You can easily spend hours watching all the things they try to blend and, if you are lucky, you can do it at work and get paid for it.

Meet us at The Duct Tape Diner. We’ve had some great stories over the counter at the Duct Tape Diner recently. If you haven’t yet read the Diner contributions, stop by! This is where we invite our visitors to share their own duct tape stories. Just like these people did:

Save the Birds
Save the Birds!
I was trimming up a tree in my front yard, and noticed after it was already down, that one of the branches contained a very small hummingbird nest with 2 tiny hummingbirds inside.  Upon closer examination, the birds were very much alive.  Needless to say, I felt horrible.  After consulting with the local university's bird sanctuary, they recommended trying to place the branch near the tree in hopes that the mom hummingbird would return.  I figured - I could do better then that - I can duct tape the branch back onto the tree in the very same spot it once was.  I'm happy to report that over the past week, the little birds have thrived, and we even saw one fly out of the nest.  Attached is a picture that shows the 2 little ones, with the duct tape in the background. - Kurt M., Savage, MN

Musical Gum Shoe I play in an old time string band (The Roller Mills String Band). This past summer, we were playing on a stage where someone before us had chewed some gum and it was right in the middle of the stage where the band plays. After I stepped in it, I got it off my shoe, but I could not get it off the stage surface and was concerned that I would continue to step in it. So, I just took out my trusty duct tape and put a strip over the gum. - Dale P., The Roller Mills String Band

How to Grow a GIANT Pumpkin
I am growing giant pumpkins this year for the first time. I found that the main vine to one of the pumpkins was splitting. It was hard to turn the pumpkin to put less strain on the vine. I decided to use "duct tape" to mend the vine back together. It seems to work great and after one month, it is still holding and the pumpkin is still in good shape. - Jack R., Fremont, WI

Ole's new cow
Ole is a farmer in Minnesota.  He is in need of a new milk cow and hears about one for sale over in North Dakota.

He drives to the North Dakota farm and looks over the cow. Ole reaches under to see if she gives milk. When he grabs the teat and pulls.. the cow farts.

Ole is very surprised. He looks at the farmer who is selling the cow, then reaches under the cow to try again. He grabs another teat, pulls, and the cow farts again. Milk does come out however, so after some discussion with the cow's owner, Ole decides to buy the cow and take her home.

When he gets back to Minnesota, he calls over his neighbor, Sven, and says, "Hey, Sven, come and look at dis here new cow I yust bought. Pull her teat, and see vat happens." Sven reaches under, pulls the teat and the cow farts. Sven looks at Ole and says, "You bought dis here cow in North Dakota, didn't yah?"

Ole is very surprised since he hadn't told Sven about his trip. Ole replies, "Yah dats right. but, how did you know?

Sven says, "My wife is from North Dakota." (Tim would like to apologize to his fellow Swedes for publishing this joke.)

Directions seen above a public baby-changing table:

Well, that’s it for this issue of "Duct Tape on a Roll" Remember that you can share this FREE duct tape and humor newsletter with your friends. Just send them this address: so they can SUBSCRIBE to our email notification list.

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May the Tape be with you!
- Jim and Tim - The Duct Tape Guys

Click here for archived On a Roll Newsletters: 1/02, 2/02, 3/02, 03/19/02, 4/02, 5/02, 6/02, 7/02, 08/02, 09/02. 10/02, 11/02, 12/02, 01/03, 02/03, 03/03, 4/03, 05/03. 06/03 07/03 8/03 9/03 10/03 11/03, 12/03, 1/04, 2/04, 3/04, 4/04, 5/04, 6/04, 7/04, 8/04, 9/04, 10/04, election issue, 11/04, 12/04, 01/05, 2/05, 3/05, 4/05, 5/05, 06/05, 7/05, 08/05, 09/05, 10/05, 11/05, 12/05, 01/06, 2/06, 3/06, 4/06, 5/06, 6/06, 7/06, 8/06, 9/06,10/06,11/06, 12/06, 1/07, 2/07, 3/07. 4/07, 5/07, 6/07. 7/07, 8-9/07,

Tim (left), Jim (other left).