The "BADGE of HONOR" If you've sent us something that we have used on our site, grab the graphic above and post it on your site and in your emails.
Submissions Please
If you have a joke or story that you would like to submit for inclusion in our next newsletter, email it to us. Just make sure it's suitable for all ages (we don't publish anything off-color). Thanks again!

Go Directly to:
Our web site is getting massive. So we will always include this handy little pull-down menu in our newsletter and on our main page. Go discover the world's most massive online tribute to duct tape:

Quote of the Month:
This is the big lie the world tells us: that the universe is connected by trade agreements, electronic banking, computer networks, shipping lanes, and the seeking of profit - nothing else. Whereas this is the truth of God: all creation is one holy web of relationships, and gifts meant for all; that creation vibrates with the pain of all its parts, because its true destiny is joy." - Julie Polter

Soapbox presents Tim's personal opinions about issues that he feels are of importance.
It has challenging stuff to think about during your duct taping projects. If you want a dose of stuff to think about click here. If you don't want to, that's okay. Tape on! Here is a brief intro to what's in this month's SOAPBOX:

Are you voting Pro-Life?.
Even if you think you are voting for pro-life, your vote may be accomplishing just the opposite.
click here

Are you on our e-mail list?
Click here - to subscribe. Then MAKE SURE you respond to the verification email that comes your way after you subscribe to make sure your email is activated in the system. Remember, we never sell or share our list with anyone and you can easily unsubscribe at any time. - Jim and Tim

Do you eBay?
No? Well, how about if you could nab some genuine Duct Tape Guy props (retired), with books and videos to boot? Click to see what our current offering on eBay is by clicking to our Duct Tape Guys on eBay page (items change without notice).

Music to Duct Tape by...
This month we feature Dan Newton's Cafe Accordian Orchestra - some of our favorite, quirky, international jazz musicians based in the Twin Cities, Minnesota. Their music will be featured in our upcoming television show pilot (posted online in December - watch your newsletter). Click here to listen to and purchase their music:

Jumbo/FREE video offer!

The Jumbo Duct Tape Book - our fourth book of seven (with over 450 pages filled with duct tape uses real and wacky). Click the special "Thumbs Up" link below and get a FREE Duct Tape Guys video tape (a $12 retail value) when you purchase a Jumbo Duct Tape Book for only $8.95. This offer is available in this newsletter only and will expire on December 15th - so hurry! CLICK THE Thumbs Up! LINK BELOW:

For more deals, go to the Duct Tape Pro Shop Garage Sale Page and get great gifts in multiples for office, school, large families, etc.

You asked for it - You got it! We've just launced some cool, designer black t-shirts with duct tape pro grunge designs and our popular "Will Duct Tape for Food". Just click to the Duct Tape Pro Shop to pick one up today. Watch for new black shirt designs, soon. Click the image on the left to go directly to our Duct Tape Pro Shop Apparel section. AND! Check out this cool new design > available in Black or Cranberry (as shown) t-shirts or a full range of white and gray apparel items.

Mary Carol - Totally Crafty Taper
Omaha, Nebraska is home to Mary Carol - who stopped by after one of our home show performances this October to show us the more "feminine" side of duct tape. Here is a table setting she made using classic silver duct tape. From the placemat to the flatware roses, it's all beautifully crafted with good old silver duct tape. And, notice the fancy purses above... Incredible work Mary!

November 2006

The Duct Tape Guys Wrap Up their TV Show Pilot
In the banquet hall of a restaurant in Sturgeon Bay, Wisconsin, Jim and Tim, the Duct Tape Guys, put the wrap on the taping of their television show pilot, "Ultimate Originals". Showing their pre-produced Sturgeon Bay videos shot at an earlier date, the guys incorporated a live studio audience for the connective "in studio" segments.

A Wacky Little Invention
One of the audience members who came up to the set for further interview was Fred (the clown that lives on the island). The photo on the upper right shows Fred, a self-proclaimed inventor, demonstrating his prosthetic thumb tape ripper. His little device fits on the thumb and has a serrated blade that cuts the duct tape. the Guys weren't that impressed, having maintained for the past thirteen years that the beauty of duct tape was that you needed no other tools with it. However, there are other tapes (like filament tape) that Fred could convince us the "Thumb Ripper" could work well on.

Beer Battered Anything... (left) We also learned how to make tasty beer battered mushrooms with Andres' owner/chef Marc. The recipe is in this month's Cookin' with the Duct Tape Guys section (link on the right).

"The Duct Tape Hair Club for Men" has been one of our show sponsors for at least nine years now... So, we figured we should give them a prominent spot in our television show as well. Notice the new "Surfer Dude" style in classic silver that Jim is wearing. You'll also notice that Jim is wearing one of our new black t-shirts. Check them out at the Duct Tape Pro Shop when you get a chance (holiday gift time is coming - hint hint...).

The Crew: Thanks to our great production crew - (below) clockwise from back left: Bill, Scott, Chris, Jake, Derek, and Tim and Jim (seated). We hope to have the final edit done and posted by December's newsletter. Stay tuned!

Cafe Accordion Orchestra thanks to the Cafe Accordion Orchestra for allowing us to use their cool and quirky international jazz music for our pilot. Check out the Cafe Accordion Orchestra's CDs on the right column, or visit their web site for audio samples

Red Duct Tape marks progress for United Way

The Duct Tape Guys lend some red Duck® brand duct tape and their cold weather taping expertise to the United Way of Door County (Wisconsin). If you feel led to contribute to the United Way and have Jim and Tim raise the red tape on the "thermometer" call 920-746-9645. Photo by Christine Nesheim

In Car Snack Holder Improvement
Kristine H. tops the cup holder snack holder that was submitted to us quite a while ago with the simple addition of a bendy straw - so the pop can, (filled with pop this time) can suppliment the snacks in the bowl. Good thinking, Kristine.

Do you have a duct tape invention that you'd like to share? Just snap a photo of it and send it ot the Duct Tape Guys. Clck here for submission instructions.

If you can't remember the lyrics, just remember Tim's new book...
It's out! It's in the stores now! and perfect for Christmas Stocking Stuffing or Hannikah gifting or Fraternity or Sorority gag gifting... Whatever the ocassion, this little gem is destined to become the pet rock phenominon of the 21st Century - or at least 2006. "It's breathtakingly stupid - yet, somehow, incredibly brilliant" It's Tim's latest wacky brain fart (idea) - "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall - the complete lyrics" Thanks to the geniuses at Andrews McMeel who laughed heartily at the idea and jumped at the chance to publish it. It's the perfect gag gift for the beer lover in your life, your frat brothers/sorority sisters, your weird uncle Ed...

Click here to find out more about the book and to order online right now. Or, if you'd like a copy autographed by Tim, click to the Duct Tape Pro Shop and order from there.

This newsletter is sponsored in part by

Dale's Discoveries
(A monthly feature that will be showcasing weird stuff that our friend Dale comes up with.) Visit Dale's TallToysTroupe site

If husbanding means "To manage (money, resources, etc) wisely and economically." Might one assume that the opposite might define wifing?

Pat, a good friend, told me a story of his Army days when he was a Mess Officer for awhile. When he left that post, he was given an Army cookbook which, being single, he sent home to his mother as a gift. She thanked him but later told him that she never used it because it was too hard to divide all the recipes by 100. Maybe he should have paged thru it first.

Pat, also sent along this helpful hint for living from those days in the Army: Never sample the new dehydrated food directly from the package and then drink lots of water. Never.

Dale's Website Discovery of the Month:

If you have ever been traveling and wished you knew the really good, funky places to eat, then this is the site for you. It's even great for finding places near where you have lived for years. If you want to see how good it is, just go do a search of your hometown and you might see the places that you thought no one else knew about.

Time to winterize
Don't struggle with getting your window air conditioner out of the window before the snow flies... Save time and your back with a little duct tape and some plastic sheeting (a garbage bag works nicely). If you want to be extra energy efficient, use a couple layers of bubble wrap under the duct tape. Remember - the Department of Homeland Security said that plastic sheeting and duct tape will protect us against chemical and biological warfare... so, surely it will be able to keep out "Old Man Winter"!

Meet us at The Duct Tape Diner. We’ve had some great stories over the counter at the Duct Tape Diner recently. If you haven’t yet read the Diner contributions, stop by! This is where we invite our visitors to share their own duct tape stories.

Just like these people did:

Like Father, Like Son The other day i was working in my shop and my five year old son came in climbed on to my bench grabed the duct tape wile running off said, "I need some tape." About 30 minutes later I went to check on him he had all his broken candy canes duct taped back together and hanging back on the tree sure did make this dad proud --- Mike T.

These boots were made from Duct Tape... For a final exam I made this pair of duct tape boots. I attached a pair of long underwear to socks to create the base, and used the sole from an old pair of sandals to create a rather comfortable pair of boots! Regular string laced them up. I wore them around campus and they kept me warm enough for winter time, and I didn't feel sweaty because the sides acted as ventilation and the knit "lining" wicked away moisture. I got an A! --- Andrea S. Wheaton, IL

DUCT successfully replaces PCV My first car was an old run-down 84 mercury cougar. There was some sort of malfunction in the vacuum lines that would cause it to constantly stall out and die at red lights and even in motion. After consulting many mechanic friends, all who were clueless, I finally caved in, popped the hood and repaired every broken vacuum line and sealed off the PCV valve with duct tape. The car never ran better. --- Gary S.

Homework Enforcer Hi my name is Steve and I tend to put things off (like home work). So one time I had a lot of home work to do and I did not want to do it. My teacher made me do it by Duct Taping me to the chair and then to the table and a pencil to my hand until I was done. The worst part of it was talking all the duct tape off of me. --- Steve

Crime Preventative Idea? You should lobby for "tear strips" in duct tape so that duct tape cannot so easily be used to commit crimes. ---- James Good idea, James. However, I would lobby for gun, knife and baseball bat control first. - the Duct Tape Guy

Duct Tape Window Gasket I drive a 1993 Ford Tempo. The car had been repossessed from the previous owner. While getting into the car, the repo-man used, I assume, a coat hanger to get in. While doing so, the water seal on the driver's side door was damaged. To repair it I simply used duct tape. --- Jeff B. See other window repairs in our Tom Ridge Auto Glass Replacement Page

Hawaiian Uses I am a tile setter - Raw ground open finger tips can be wrapped in Duck tape to prevent stinging from water and porter cement - repairs the rubber gloves too. Lastly: Auto body and paint - large holes and Bondo are a problem that crumpled newspaper and Duck tape can fix by filling the hole. I have even taped right over a hole and smeared the Bondo right over. Car seat repair also. --- Janna, Maui, Hawaii

Don't ever trust the Duct Tape Guys to take a normal photo with you... here they are with HGTV and the Food Channel's Jill Cordes (wonderful sport that she is) at their event in Omaha. To see the Duct Tape Guys goon with other celebs check out our scrapbook.

Looking for a holiday gift for someone who has everything? How about a cow? A sheep? Or a camel? We encourage you to check out Oxfam America Unwrapped - Oxfam America works in 26 countries around the world. This catalog contains gift items that symbolically represent our work. The items selected represent project goals from grants disbursed by our seven offices around the world. The purchase of each gift item is a contribution toward Oxfam America's many programs, not a donation to a specific project or goal. Your donation will be used where it is needed the most - to help people living in poverty throughout the world.

click here for more information about Oxfam America Unwrapped

From MegaStore Security
To Mrs. Darren Fenton
re: Please control your husband

Dear Mrs. Fenton:
Our store is considering banning your family from ever shopping with us again unless your husband stops his antics while you are shopping. Below is a list of offenses over the past few months, all verified by our surveillance cameras.
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in house wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the ladies' restroom.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, "Code 3 in house wares"....and watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the service desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. September 14: Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'd bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When our clerks ask whether they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera, used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knew where the antidepressants were.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department practiced his "Madonna look" using different sized funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled, "PICK ME! PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams, "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

And last but not least:
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, and waited a while; then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

Please, try to control your husband while shopping in our store, or kindly leave him at home.
Thank you. - A.J. Atkins, MegaStore Loss Prevention Supervisor

You can find more practical jokes just like the ones used to compose the "actual" letter above in tim's Practical Joker's handbook - available here:
If you ever feel stupid, then just read on. If you've learned to speak fluent English, you must be a genius! This little treatise on the lovely language we share is only for the brave. Peruse at your own risk, English lovers.

Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the row of oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Click here to listen to the Duct Tape Guys early radio bits, "Duct Tape Talk".

Public Notice Enhancer
We spotted this public notice in Tucson, Arizona. Hard to miss with the bright green paper - even harder to miss with the duct tape adorning the sides...
(below) the Arizona Law Enforcement Booth at a home show in Tucson.

Check out our Sightings pages for more Tucson duct tape sightings.

Well, that’s it for this issue of "Duct Tape on a Roll" Remember that you can share this FREE duct tape and humor newsletter with your friends. Just send them this address: so they can SUBSCRIBE to our email notification list.

If you want OFF of our email list at any time, that’s fine with us, we don’t want to bother anyone with stuff they don't want. Just click the list link above and follow the unsubscribe instructions - don't send us an email asking us to remove you - we have no control over the list - you must click the link above or on your email notification to unsubscribe. Thanks.

May the Tape be with you!
- Jim and Tim - The Duct Tape Guys

Click here for archived On a Roll Newsletters: 1/02, 2/02, 3/02, 03/19/02, 4/02, 5/02, 6/02, 7/02, 08/02, 09/02. 10/02, 11/02, 12/02, 01/03, 02/03, 03/03, 4/03, 05/03. 06/03 07/03 8/03 9/03 10/03 11/03, 12/03, 1/04, 2/04, 3/04, 4/04, 5/04, 6/04, 7/04, 8/04, 9/04, 10/04, election issue, 11/04, 12/04, 01/05, 2/05, 3/05, 4/05, 5/05, 06/05, 7/05, 08/05, 09/05, 10/05, 11/05, 12/05, 01/06, 2/06, 3/06, 4/06, 5/06, 6/06, 7/06, 8/06, 9/06,10/06,

Tim (left), Jim (other left).