The "BADGE of HONOR" If you've sent us something that we have used on our site, grab the graphic above and post it on your site and in your emails.
If you have a joke or story that you would like to submit for inclusion in our next newsletter, email it to us. Just make sure it's suitable for all ages (we don't publish anything off-color). Thanks again!
Quote of the month:
"The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results." - Benjamin Franklin
Soapbox presents Tim's personal opinions about serious issues that he feels are of importance.
Cheap Hosts? Dinner guests in medieval England were expected to bring their own knives to the table -- hosts did not provide them. The fork did not appear until the sixteenth century and knives-and-forks were not in general use in England until the seventeenth century. Source: "Isaac Asimov's Book of Facts"
Crude Method... Crude oil was being drilled for in ancient China. In the 6th century it was recorded that hollow bamboo rods were driven into the ground in search of brine to provide salt for cattle. In the process, they also came across natural gas and flammable petroleum, which they used themselves or sold for fuel. Source: "Reader's Digest Book of Facts"
Scrabble anyone? The highest scoring word in the English language game of Scrabble is 'Quartzy'. This will score 164 points if played across a red triple-word square with the Z on a light blue double-letter square. It will score 162 points if played across two pink double-word squares with the Q and the Y on those squares. 'Bezique' and 'Cazique' are next with a possible 161 points. All three words score an extra 50 points for having seven letters and therefore emptying the letter rack in one go.
Cookin' with Duct Tape:
Rich, cheesy goodness from the sister and sister-in-law of your two favorite Duct Tape Cheeseheads - Jim and Tim. click here for this easy-to-make, gourmet hors d'oeuvre recipe
Subscribe Hopefully you found this month's newsletter and were notified without a hitch. We changed over to a new listserv (opt-in/out) software that will hopefully allow better service for our subscribers. If you don't think you are on the new list, Click here - it should be up and running by the 3rd of March. Thanks for your patience during this transition. - Jim and Tim
This was on an actual sign in our actual grocery store:
I found myself singing the Bob Dylan song "Blowin' in the Wind" to myself the other day. My five and a half year old son was apparently listening. After awhile he said "One", then he said "Two". When I asked him what he was saying that about he said that a person had to look up one time to see the sky and needs two ears to hear people cry. Then he said "Ask me some more".
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OR If you don't have a digital camera or just want a bumper sticker, you can send $1.00 and get one delivered to your U.S. mailing address. Just send $1 with a self-addressed, stamped (39¢) #10 (business-sized) envelope to: Duct Tape Guys Bumper Sticker c/o 732 Memorial Drive, Suite 200, Sturgeon Bay, WI 54235
Take advantage of our overstock
Meet us at The Diner. We’ve had some great stories over the counter at the Duct Tape Diner recently. If you haven’t yet read the Diner contributions, stop by! This is where we invite our visitors to share their own duct tape stories.
Just like these people did:
College Drinkin' Aid College party use of duct tape... The idea is, if you’re attached to your bottle, you need to finish it before you can go to the bathroom. If you’re really hard-core, you duct tape two bottles to yourself, one to each hand. So yeah, there’s me, attempting to prove how hard-core I am by taping myself to my drink, which I managed to finish, earning the respect of my peers in the process. It’s stupid, but it’s kind of fun to see who can do it and who can’t. - jess And, if you've had too much, duct tape your car keys to the ceiling so you aren't tempted to drive while tipsy.
ACE Vacuum Repair I'm a night janitor here at the only high school, and our floor vacuum's motor broke down, meaning we've had to send it away for at least 3 weeks. In the meantime, we only have wet-dry vacuums without beater bar attachments. Someone found an old beater bar which plugs in directly to the wet-dry vac to supply it power, and the hose from the wet-dry vac fits perfectly onto the hose from the beater bar with duct tape. The power cord from the beater bar is also duct-taped every 6 inches to each hose to reduce tangling, and since the end of the beater bar was too light, it kept doing pop-a-wheelies on me when I was trying to run it across the floor, so I grabbed a 3-hole puncher from a nearby counter in the library, duct-taped it to the top, and it went perfectly. - Ryan, Maple Creek, SK, Canada
Wife Pleaser My wife was recently freaking out over an unruly wet-wipe container. Realizing that the lid itself was hopeless, I instinctively reached for the duct tape. After taping the lid closed, I heard a phrase I had never heard before, nor had I ever expected it. "Thanks, you're a great fix-it husband." - Peter von H., Decatur, GA
Duct Tape Frame Job During a recent home show in Buffalo, New York, the resident picture framer, Walt, showed his creativity and duct tape prowise when asked by an attendee to frame the Duct Tape Guys' autograph photo. We think the duct tape matting compliments the oak frame quite nicely. Nice job, Walt!
CactusAid A friend from a website I frequent told me about your great website after a comment I made in a discussion topic concerning removing pesky cactus needles from a woman's backside. I had had a couple of rogue splinters in the soft part of my palm that I could see but couldn't get to. After it took a razorblade, a pair of pointy tweezers and a lot of cussing to get just one little one out I tried putting a little little piece of duct tape over the area so I could keep woriking and ended up leaving it for an hour or so. When I peeled it off, most of the splinters came with it. The others had to work their way closer to the surface before another piece worked on them. - Lin-Z F., EL Paso, TX
Got an idea for a shirt? Look through our apparel offerings. If you don't see your idea, and we haven't used it in the past, we just might use it. If we produce it, we will send you a free shirt. (email your idea to email@example.com - put "shirt idea" in the subject line)
|Jim and Tim meet Andrew Dan Jumbo We have our share of meeting celebrities in our travels. This past month we did a show with Andrew Dan Jumbo the hunk carpenter from TLC's "While You Were Out." We were so impressed with this Brit's charisma that we decided to change out accents and our names to Jim and Tim Jumbo.|
Things you would never know without the movie industry
We all have had our fill of government, bureaucracy and red tape...
Click here to listen to the Duct Tape Guys early radio bits, "Duct Tape Talk".
|If you spot duct tape - snap a photo and send it to us. We'll add it to our Duct Tape Sightings pages. Make sure you tell us where the shot was taken!|
|Well, that’s it for this issue of "Duct Tape on a Roll" Remember that you can share this FREE duct tape and humor newsletter with your friends. Just send them this address: http://www.ducttapeguys.com/list so they can SUBSCRIBE to our email notification list.
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May the Tape be with you!
Click here for archived On a Roll Newsletters: 1/02, 2/02, 3/02, 03/19/02, 4/02, 5/02, 6/02, 7/02, 08/02, 09/02. 10/02, 11/02, 12/02, 01/03, 02/03, 03/03, 4/03, 05/03. 06/03 07/03 8/03 9/03 10/03 11/03, 12/03, 1/04, 2/04, 3/04, 4/04, 5/04, 6/04, 7/04, 8/04, 9/04, 10/04, election issue, 11/04, 12/04, 01/05, 2/05, 3/05, 4/05, 5/05, 06/05, 7/05, 08/05, 09/05, 10/05, 11/05, 12/05, 01/06, 2/06,
Tim (left), Jim (other left).