The "BADGE of HONOR" If you've sent us something that we have used on our site, grab the graphic above and post it on your site and in your emails.
If you have a joke or story that you would like to submit for inclusion in our next newsletter, email it to us. Just make sure it's suitable for all ages (we don't publish anything off-color). Thanks again!
Go Directly to:
Our web site is getting massive. So we little always include this handy little pull-down menu in our newsletter and on our main page. Go discover the world's most massive online tribute to duct tape:
Quotes of the Month:
Soapbox presents Tim's personal opinions about serious issues that he feels are of importance.
President Gerald Ford used to have cottage cheese with steak sauce on it for lunch aboard Air Force One. He also liked to have Chocolate Angel Food Cake for dessert.
Cookin' with Duct Tape:
We all scream for Ice Cream... Shannon Jackson Arnold not only screams about it - she's written a book about it. And even covers the use of duct tape in the making homemade icecream. Check out her secret methods at our Cookin' with Duct Tape pages. click here for the ice cream ideas and other recipies from the Duct Tape Guys.
Take advantage of our overstock
Get a Bumper Sticker FREE! Send us a photo of you holding up a roll of duct tape and one of our books, our video, or wearing one of our shirts in front of a landmark (in your community, or some famous landmark anywhere in the world) and we will send you a Duct Tape Pro bumper sticker. Remember to include your mailing address with your digital photo.
OR If you don't have a digital camera or just want a bumper sticker, you can send $1.00 and get one delivered to your U.S. mailing address. Just send $1 with a self-addressed, stamped (39¢) #10 (business-sized) envelope to: Duct Tape Guys Bumper Sticker c/o 732 Memorial Drive, Suite 200, Sturgeon Bay, WI 54235
Karen blew us away with her duct tape purses (sample on the right) - we've posted a whole page of them in our Duct Tape Fashion Accessories area. Check them out! Click here.
We've switched our e-mail listserve software If you were a subscriber to our email list in the past, you would have gotten a verification email making sure you want to opt-in to our new list. Over 700 of you didn't respond to this and thereby fell off of the list. If you want to keep getting our newsletter announcements and special notices that we send out (not more than twice a month), Click here - and resubscribe. Then MAKE SURE you respond to the verification email that comes your way after you subscribe to make sure your email is activated in the system. Remember, we never sell or share our list with anyone and you can easily unsubscribe at any time. - Jim and Tim
Music to duct tape by:
Duct Tape Dad of the Year Contest!
Yet another Stuck at Prom reminder
A friend of mine used to provide computers to corporations. The way he would tell if he was talking to engineers or management was to tell them that his computers were so fast that they could perform an infinite loop in four minutes. If they laughed, they were engineers. If they were impressed, they were management.
Meet us at The Diner. We’ve had some great stories over the counter at the Duct Tape Diner recently. If you haven’t yet read the Diner contributions, stop by! This is where we invite our visitors to share their own duct tape stories.
Just like these people did:
Post Surgery Running Bra I am an avid runner and I have run daily for the past 15 years since I quit smoking. Not only do I enjoy the physical benefits of running to stay in shape, but I also enjoy the psychological benefits of mood elevation and stress relief. Running was never more critical for me than when I was diagnosed with breast cancer this past year. Fortunately, I had a lumpectomy but after my surgery I remained very stressed because I couldn't run until my surgical wounds healed. There were no post-surgical running bras. Then I remembered the duct tape that I had recently purchased to temporarily hold the side mirror onto the door of my daughter's car until repaired. Could it work? With a little duct tape I tailor-made a support over the top of my running bra each day until I healed. And because I had already purchased the see clear duct tape it was also very discreet. Thanks to duct tape I missed only two days of running after my surgery and I was able to participate in The Susan G. Koman 5K Race for The Cure in Louisville, Ky. - Denise Mott
Duct Tape Idle Screw Fix Last year a good friend bought me your calendar for a Christmas present. Little did I know how helpfull it would be. The same friend had a turn of bad luck with a car accident a very long way from home we had to trailer the car back but not without duct taping the trailer light back together and the wireing harness back together after being pulled over by one of New Hampshire's finest. It also came in handy to bind the chains together in sub zero weather.....at night......on a mountain....in the wind. But wait we still aren't to the end yet she got another friends car and the ignition switch had broken (sorry no fix for that) when she received it back from the dealer it would constantly stall so I popped the hood and tried to fix it but the idle screw could not be adjusted, I told her sorry and was about to send her on her way when SHE suggested - yep you guessed it - good ole duct tape. Now it purrs like a kitten and the gun metal grey matches the aluminum nicely. (see photo on left). - Mark
Duct Tape Wiper Blades I was running low on cash, snow was coming, so i did this quick fix on my wiper blades to get me through driving in the snow! they worked great on the snow, but then it rained later and they sucked with the liquid! had to finally get new ones. - Leslie L. Bennett
Fred's Hood Latch When your hood latch goes due to a little "lapse of depth perception" - thank goodness there's duct tape!
Rock and Roll Tape On Friday March 10, 2006 as I was watching a concert by Rhonda Vincent & The Rage at the Douglass Theater in Macon, Georgia, and Duct Tape became part of the show. During the first song Rhonda's microphone went out. She moved over to the next microphone and finished the song. The band moved the non working microphone from the center of the stage to the far right of the stage. After the second song while Rhonda was speaking to the audience, Josh Williams (guitar player) started working on the microphone. While he was fixing the microphone, Hunter Berry (fiddle player) ask the audience " Does any one have some duct tape?". Well that drew a large laughter from everyone. I sure wish I had taken my duct tape to the concert. That would have been "A Duct Tape Moment". - Billy
Got a kid who loves duct tape?
Got an idea for a shirt? Look through our apparel offerings. If you don't see your idea, and we haven't used it in the past, we just might use it. If we produce it, we will send you a free shirt. (email your idea to email@example.com - put "shirt idea" in the subject line)
|Weirdest Use Ever? Often when doing radio interviews, we're asked, "what's the weirdest duct tape use we've ever seen?" Well, this has to be in the top ten - duct taping a fetal pig back together after being dissected in biology class. The duct taper of the pig named him, "Frankenswine."|
Here's a nice use of flash animation:.
Mr. Otto - Twisted Olympics by Bruno Bozzetto.
(have your sound on) - enjoy! click here
(pg-rated cartoon - yes, decapitations happen - but in a humorous, simple line drawing sort of way - a bit more graphic than roadrunner cartoons, but just plain silly entertainment)
More at www.bozzetto.com
The Bulwer-Lytton Contest
This year's 10 winners of the Bulwer-Lytton contest, aka "Dark and Stormy Night Contest" (run by the English Dept. of San Jose State University), wherein one writes only the first line of a bad novel:
10) "As a scientist, Throckmorton knew that if he were ever to break wind in the echo chamber, he would never hear the end of it.
9) "Just beyond the Narrows, the river widens."
8) "With a curvaceous figure that Venus would have envied, a tanned, unblemished oval face framed with lustrous thick brown hair, deep azure-blue eyes fringed with long black lashes, perfect teeth that vied for competition, and a small straight nose, Marilee had a beauty that defied description."
7) "Andre, a simple peasant, had only one thing on his mind as he crept along the East wall: 'Andre creep... Andre creep... Andre creep.'"
6) "Stanislaus Smedley, a man always on the cutting edge of narcissism, was about to give his body and soul to a back alley sex-change surgeon to become the woman he loved."
5) "Although Sarah had an abnormal fear of mice, it did not keep her from eeking out a living at a local pet store."
4) "Stanley looked quite bored and somewhat detached, but then penguins often do."
3) "Like an over-ripe beefsteak tomato rimmed with cottage cheese, the corpulent remains of Santa Claus lay dead on the hotel floor."
2) "Mike Hardware was the kind of private eye who didn't know the meaning of the word 'fear'; a man who could laugh in the face of danger and spit in the eye of death -- in short, a moron with suicidal tendencies."
1) "The sun oozed over the horizon, shoved aside darkness, crept along the greensward, and, with sickly fingers, pushed through the castle window,
revealing the pillaged princess, hand at throat, crown asunder, gaping in
frenzied horror at the sated, sodden amphibian lying beside her, disbelieving
the magnitude of the frog's deception, screaming madly, 'You lied!"
Click here to listen to the Duct Tape Guys early radio bits, "Duct Tape Talk".
|If you spot duct tape - snap a photo and send it to us. We'll add it to our Duct Tape Sightings pages. Make sure you tell us where the shot was taken!|
|Well, that’s it for this issue of "Duct Tape on a Roll" Remember that you can share this FREE duct tape and humor newsletter with your friends. Just send them this address: http://www.ducttapeguys.com/list so they can SUBSCRIBE to our email notification list.
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May the Tape be with you!
Click here for archived On a Roll Newsletters: 1/02, 2/02, 3/02, 03/19/02, 4/02, 5/02, 6/02, 7/02, 08/02, 09/02. 10/02, 11/02, 12/02, 01/03, 02/03, 03/03, 4/03, 05/03. 06/03 07/03 8/03 9/03 10/03 11/03, 12/03, 1/04, 2/04, 3/04, 4/04, 5/04, 6/04, 7/04, 8/04, 9/04, 10/04, election issue, 11/04, 12/04, 01/05, 2/05, 3/05, 4/05, 5/05, 06/05, 7/05, 08/05, 09/05, 10/05, 11/05, 12/05, 01/06, 2/06, 3/06, 4/06,
Tim (left), Jim (other left).